a couple of people, (when i say couple i'm probably embellishing, i mean its not like i have a cult following) have mentioned reading about my boy blogs, and then pursue to ask me for advice in relational dilemmas. EVERYONE: THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT: I do not offer sound advice. I am not emotionally stable to offer you advice seeing as how whenever I'm in a 5 foot radius from a male human I feel magnetized to his side and shaking his hand and mumbling words before I even form the sentences and the conversations normally end with 'do you have a girlfriend'. my middle name is desperation. and I KNOW... for those that tell me constantly.... I'm only 20.
So while I wallow in the memories of handing boys hidden poems with descriptive feelings and then being ignored... all while harboring feelings that seem to never go away. I mean, its been 5 years people, can I move on already? I fear everyday someone I know is going to call Dr. Phil to my doorstep to come get me out of this relational funk/obsession I have with a 5 year... nothing. it's not even a relationship... its literally nothing. Anyways, I digress, while I wallow in the mems, I've done this new thing where I obsess over really great guys, that are ALREADY TAKEN. (If any wives are reading this, I apologize now, I don't know how to control myself). You know the normal great examples like Robbie Seay, and Matt Chandler. I obsess over reading their wives' blogs and pretending to lead the life of a mother and caring wife and all the other things that are way too far out of my reach.
Oftentimes, and when I say often I typically mean like... everyday. I find myself quoting 'The Holiday" to myself. There's this one phrase that Iris says that hits me so hard every time I hear it... 'Unrequited Love is the Worst Kind' and yet it's my favorite. I'm literally infatuated with the thrills (aka horrors) it brings me everyday of my life. Its all so masochistic, I just don't know what to do with myself.